When choosing right over wrong feels like a challenge…

Posted by Vanessa Chavez on


It all started with the “little white lie” and then I noticed my life had become an ocean of lies. I never saw any harm in telling my friends that I wasn’t going out because “I was sick” instead of simply saying “I do not feel like going out tonight”, but the truth is that when one small lie becomes easy to say, then a bigger lie starts coming up as the next step in your horizon. The same happens with wrong decisions;

Choosing to make one “small” wrong decision can also escalate to making very big bad decisions.


I have witnessed throughout my life family members, friends and even myself chose to do wrong over right, and all I have to say is that none of us were ever proud of those decisions. The fact is that no matter how good it sounds or looks, the reward of doing evil or doing the wrong thing never pays with satisfaction; instead it always comes with regrets. You know those stomach aches you feel when you lied to your friends and someone is about to find out the truth? or when you stole something and you are about to get busted? 


I am a believer that there is a still small voice in our hearts that lead us into choosing right over wrong, but our minds sometimes debates it into choosing what seems more "convenient". The question always comes to that moment when we are facing the two options: to be or not to be?

To be that person of honor, of truth, of justice, or to be that person that choses the quick way out, the route that pays more, the path that seems more promising, but that with our eyes closed, we decide to evade the consequences of that decision… so, what to do?


Back when I was 18 years old, I moved from Colombia to Florida to pursue my higher education. I was working at Burger King and every week I would receive my paycheck and go to the mall to spend it on clothes and party. I had never received money in my life besides the money my mom would give me to get snacks at high school, so I wasn’t very familiar with the concept of salary, expenses, or even worse, savings; that was a term that was definitely not in my vocabulary.  


One day an older man probably in his 40’s, came to the restaurant and coincidentally, I was taking orders at the registry instead of being in the back at the chicken sandwich station. He started telling me how beautiful I was and proceeded to give me his business card; He ran a pharmacy down the street, and he asked me if I would want to work for him. At this point in my life I was living with my aunt, who to tell you the truth, was getting sick and tired of my partying and whose patience was running out. I also did not see my education happening anytime soon, so I started considering his offer. He took my phone number and invited me out to eat one night. I believe this man was divorced, but I was so naïve, I did not even look at his hand to check for a ring.


We went out to eat and afterwards he told me he needed to get something from his office; it was around 9pm or later, and he asked me to go with him; once we got to the office, it was dark and alone, next thing I know is that he is grabbing me against the wall to kiss me. Instead of stopping him, I didn’t resist. (smh...I get nauseous just by recalling this experience)


“I want to take care of you”, He said.

I went back to my aunt’s place and he called me and said:

“If you are mine, I will give you your own apartment and a car” My eyes opened big…a car! An apartment! That will be so cool!

You see… this was one of my moments to make a decision. To choose to make the right decision and cut all communication with that guy or to make a very-very wrong decision in my life and fall for his attempt to pay for my body, soul and mind. Although the things he was offering were things I really wanted, the ultimate cost was without a doubt, disgusting. I could barely deal with the thought of a kiss from that guy, yet alone, be his lover. I didn’t continue with that nonsense and shortly after that, God put it in my heart to join the U.S Army. I was able to pay not only for my bachelors but also my Masters degree. I am now working for a global bank and have been blessed to live in great places.


My decision to choose right over wrong was a seed that took a bit longer to bloom and it did require work and dedication, but let me tell you it was so worth it.


Sadly, we see so many women choosing material things over their own dignity, bodies and even their sanity. 


Back in the 70’s and 80’s in my hometown, there were a number of young people who came from very well off families and were given the resources to go to college and have their own places in the capital. They decided instead to go work for a friend who became an influential drug dealer; he was offering them a world that money could buy. They quit school, they forsook their families, and they followed what seemed to be an adventure and a reward full of riches. This guy eventually lost his mind and was sentenced to life in prison. Some of his followers died, and the others, well, they never got an education and they all spent all of their money, so they had to go back to their families. They never had careers or successful sources of income. Unfortunately, the result of this was only regrets.


Not long ago, I was volunteering with an organization that motivates young children to pursue their education. As professionals, we go and share with them our stories, the obstacles that we once had and our successful accomplishments. At that time all I wanted to tell them was to always choose right over wrong, even when wrong seems easier and more convenient; even when selling drugs seems like a good deal especially when that child comes from a poor family; or even when selling her body seems like the easiest way for a little girl to get money when her parents don't have money for this week's grocery shopping.


I have made my number of wrong decisions in my past, but now that my heart opened to the love of God and I continuously ask for His guidance, making the right decisions has become easier and clearer. One of my dreams is that our children don’t have to go through our horrible mistakes or experiences so they can learn a lesson. I dream that they can hear our stories and they are encouraged to follow their hearts and always differentiate right from wrong.


We need to be examples of righteousness.


So when that moment comes and you are about to tell a little white lie, let’s instead choose to say the truth no matter how difficult or challenging that feels. Let’s choose right over wrong always feeling peace in our hearts that this choice will be not only beneficial to us but those around us. Wrong choices may have temporary rewards but the consequences can be deadly; right choices on the other hand have eternal and even spiritual rewards. Even as to a little lie, or a little gossip here and there, or any "little" wrongdoing always come with a manifestation either in the physical or the spiritual or both. I can guarantee you that the reward of doing the right thing will be worth it, and there would not be any reason to be ashamed or to hide anything because you will be proud of your actions instead of regretful. There is so much freedom in our hearts when we choose and know we are doing the right thing. It is liberating!  


May you experience freedom in choosing right over wrong! :)



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